Is this some sort of a joke?

Could there be a more inappropriate collar for a dog like me? Really? I'd like to know who chose it.

My money's on him: girl dog - pink flowers. Huh - wake up - see the teeth - I'll have them wrapped round your arm in no time mister.

So where's the little, black leather number I used to have? I didn't chew it up did I?

Well, I can't be seen wearing this one; it doesn't even match my lead. (Whoops! Did I say that? I mean - I don't give a woof - I'm not the fashionista around here).

But seriously, I can't go out in this thing.

Hey?

What?

Car keys? Door keys?

Yeah! The beach. The beach. 

I'm off . . .

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